Convictions formed either through inquiry or a product of one of these movements, over times, start to define us. These convictions once ingrained into the mind and soul becomes part of the "self" and demand defending. Those who took the rational route hold on because they have either verified the soundness of the premises behind the resulting conclusions or as a result of an ontological process free of lottery winning odds "possibilities". On the other hand, those who end up taking the third party reviews route and the parroting of the accompanying set of "explanations", their convictions are just as real. The former verifiable, the latter a case of repeated references to the reviewer or arguments heavy on either logical fallacies or seriously challenged premises or both. Hence, whenever these two groups clash, it invariably turns into a perfect recipe for frustration, for both parties.
In essence, both are merely defending their convictions and by implication their "self". Intellectual honesty and academic consistencies are secondary to both and are rooted in the above diverging bases.
In the case of Islam, the fast divergence of these two groups can be witnessed on these forums. Islam, as detailed in the primary document Quran, is the very pinnacle of intellectual honesty and academic consistency. Sadly like all human endeavors worth fighting for is dependent on Education and education of the right type. Unfortunately, even the art of rhetoric and the accompanying discipline of logic once taught as part of the trivium (the third of course was grammar) is no longer part of core curriculums the world over.
Needless to say, the above state of affair, regardless of the political system in place, suits the establishment because it deprives the man on the street of the ability to put up sustained opposition to policies that are not in the public interest. Which is only possible through convictions reached via the critical thinking route and goes beyond the flash demos on the street. On recent evidence easily manageable. The difficulty, of course, is that in a world gone bonkers, the education and critical thinking route in most cases is a lonely journey. The mob, on the other hand, is a group activity, enhanced by elements of bullying and unpredictability. It also happens to be short on real change.
The establishments have become very adept at moving the debate to the emotionally charged circle. And hence are routinely able to sway opinions amass on the strength of "security", "honor", "culture", "history" etc and most of it is done through the very medium that is the key to liberation, substandard core education and the modern equivalent, the Big Media :)
Let's keep the spirit of ENQUIRY alive :)
This comment is unrelated to your post so I apologize in advance but I just want to say that I agree with you now. I commented on one of your posts a year or so back and gave you a hard time, but now that I have had some time to do some intense studying, I now understand where your criticism of hadith comes from. It almost wrecked my faith a bit, there's so many hadiths that contradict one another and that go against the prophet's(pbuh) character and the book of Allah swt. I also realized how much islam has been distorted and innovated, you can thank our shia brothers for showing me this; how many people especially Umar(ra) MAY have introduced several innovations to our religion(believe it or not the proof is in Bukhari and muslim smh). However, this doesn't mean that the shia are totally innovation free either, they may be more accurate as far as fiqh, prayer, and the concept of tawhid goes but when it comes to cursing people,the filth they spread about Aisha(ra) and the companions that doesn't have strong evidence, or to excessively mourning a MAN each year, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that this is blatantly unislamic. Not to mention that the Quran says nothing about following Ahlul Bayt(ra) or the companions(ra) after the prophet(pbuh). I know that many of the hadith may be accurate sayings of the prophet(saww), but there is also much that is doubtful, and the prophet(saww) says in one hadith to stay away from what is doubtful lol. All in all, I have chosen to stay away from hadiths from here on out seeing that they have caused me many problems. I think there are many benefits that can be arrived from them but there is also a lot of poison contained in them. Realistically, people are never going to stop following hadith books so I think that they should be seriously filtered through in an academic setting of top scholars. (there were even top scholars at azhar a few years back who acknowledged their problems especially with the narrations of Abu Hurairuh(ra) but declined to take action being afraid that people would go nanners over traditions that have been followed for so long). The religious sciences need to be revived seeing as though the majority of muslims are directly or indirectly following 4 imams who lived a thousand or so years ago! How crazy is that lol. I think one day I may embark on this journey, but until then, I'm going to focus only on the Quran as the prophet(saww) and earliest scholars of islam intended. Thanks for these posts brother keep doing what you do but remain humble and don't let those things hold you back from being active with our 'institutionalized'(for lack of better description) brothers and sisters in islam because at the end of the day, whether sunni, shia, ect. we are all muslims and still share the same core principles of islam and those are what are best for the world. Jazakallah Khair!
ReplyDeleteSalm and thank you for updating me. Don't worry I am use to people giving me a hard time :) I am always happy for people who have the courage to question their own convictions and in the process free themselves from the seriously strong claws of the sect scene.
DeleteAnd thank you for reminding me to be humble and indeed we are all Muslims :)
May God reserve a place for you in Paradise and ease your way getting there.
Salam, I have a few questions that I'll ask over time in sha Allah
ReplyDeleteMy first question is concerning Quran 53:21-22, which sees the division of God having females and humans having males an unfair division. As though having a daughter is shameful. Please don't say God was condemning it because He doesn't have children, it's obvious the condemnation is because they said DAUGHTERS as though it's shameful and unfair. I would really like if you could help as it's really getting to me lol
Salam, interesting observation and if the two verses you are referring to are taken by themselves then yes it would seem that way but if we were to read on the context becomes more clear. In fact it is better to read the whole Surah where the theme is people claiming stuff without knowledge and labeling Angels for instance with female names without really knowing their gender and then goes on to assert that this distinction of male and female in itself is unfair because it is created from the same source so to speak Quran 53:45 Hence the very notion of preferring one over the other is the issue as far as I can make out.
DeleteI will give it some more thought (and please you do the same) and see what I can add to it.
What's your take on the determinism vs free will argument?
ReplyDeleteSalam and thank you dropping by my humble blog :)
DeleteThe notion of God knowing and at the same time we being responsible for our actions is pretty straightforward. It is easy for God to know every single permutation of our actions. In fact it is easy for God to even know which one of the various permutation on offer we are going to go for and it being written down, that is every different version of it or the one that we will ultimately choose, does not change the fact that we will still be responsible for choosing the one out of the almost infinite number of permutations and the resulting outcome. Any other way and the value of free will (even if it is not 100% free) and in turn our own existence will be reduced to exactly zero.
I will try and expand on it shortly ...
Thanks for responding, I would love if you could elaborate and perhaps make a post about determinism vs. free will? :) And discuss the Islamic point of view and how it fits into the philosophical argument about free will, how much of it we have, etc.
DeleteRamadan Mubarak :)
I’ve been reading your blog for a couple of years now, I’m not sure if you’d remember me or not from Yahoo! Answers (I sort of prefer not to tell you who I am because you might think differently of me for what I’m going to ask/talk to you about because I have no one else to talk to lol)
ReplyDeleteFor all my life I’ve struggled against my sexuality. It began when I was a child, “feeling” different and the usual crap, having “unnatural” tendencies as I understand it from my society. I began with “worrying” that I was gay, scared to death at times.. then it was almost as though I couldn’t deny it, I was different. As I grew up I prayed and prayed that perhaps I was wrong, I don’t feel like a bad person even though everyone says gays are diseased and what-not. I then prayed that I’d stop feeling this way, that I can be attracted to women and love women. But now I just can’t do it anymore. I’ve seen LGBT Muslim groups but what’s the point if your religion is completely against it? I’ve tried to study into the topic of homosexuality and Islam, perhaps trying to find a loop hole, I would love to read “Homosexuality & Islam” by Scott Kugle (an American Muslim convert who happens to be gay) but it’s impossible to get my hands on that book here. All I see online is Muslims saying that homosexuality is a disease and you should try “talking yourself out of it”. Lol WHAT!? I’ve tried that for ages, I can’t talk myself out of it. I’ve tried avoiding thinking about it, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling the “evil desires”. Am I really a bad person? Is it really Satan that’s making me feel like this? Well we’re in Ramadan and apparently Satan’s locked up so why do I still feel like this lol.. And of course they’ll say that it’s cause of Satan’s influence on me. So basically I have one month a year to fight these desires? Yeah whatever. You can’t fight sexual orientation, you can’t teach a straight person to be gay or vice versa!. I grew up and have lived all my life in what I believe to be one of the most close-minded societies in the world, so obviously it’s not societies fault that I’m gay. I know I’m rambling on, it’s just that I can’t control what I feel, and I find no comfort when I read verses like “You practise your lusts on men rather than women?” from the story of the people of Lot in the Qur’an. L what am I supposed to do to myself? Is suicide the answer!? I might as well since I’m a human devil with an evil disease that cannot be fought. I’ve always been in denial about my feelings, talking myself out of it but I couldn’t continue denying it when I fell in love with a man. It doesn’t feel wrong Life Guru, it doesn’t feel like loving someone is wrong regardless of gender. I know it’s “Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve” but so I’m not supposed to live a normal happy life? I can’t get married or be happy? Express my love (even if it’s just verbal expression, telling the guy how much I care and love him would be enough for me). Please don’t tell me to pray for it to go away cause I tried, please don’t tell me homosexuality isn’t natural because that doesn’t really matter as it seems pretty unchangeable.. homosexuality is constantly compared to paedophilia and other “sexual disorders”. So I’m as bad as a paedophile? In fact worse because I can’t get married and live a happy life whereas many paedophiles have been married to adults and are capable of feeling love for them. Life Guru, it would help me a lot if you could shed some light on Islam’s view of homosexuality and even your own personal view. I respect your opinion and see you to be a wise man/woman not chained by the morals of a backward society many of us have grown up in or at least been exposed to. Thanks and I’d appreciate if you could reply asap as I feel like I’m running out of options and this is my last hope L maybe you’ll give me the answer I’ve been praying for God to show meme haha..
Salam, sorry I was on the road, just got back, will try and reply to your questions in a day or two. No matter what we are facing, there is always hope in the Universe of our Lord.
DeleteSalam, Well you have put me on the spot, I don't know if I am even qualified to give you advice. What I can do is point out the Islamic perspective but I guess you already have a pretty good idea about it minus the devil bit :). In short it is not allowed. Before I go further I do know that humans are not devils and it may seem like the end of the world now but only if you sell yourself short. Of course in a world gone mad it is unfair to pick on a particular group or lifestyle. At the same time, Islam is a 100% verifiable system of belief through the verses of the Quran. It is not up to individual Muslims to decide on a particular matter. We already have the Quran and if one has verified it to be the word of God then the issue stands resolved. As Muslims we have to be mindful of verified God's injunctions which has declared marriage as a civil contract between two persons of opposite sex from the community. This render having sex in a homosexual relationship a punishable act as per the Quran (and other scripture with variations). This is no different than having sex outside the institution of marriage for heterosexual couples which is also a punishable act.There are provisions for forgiveness in both cases but not toleration.
DeleteIt is important to keep a few things in mind. If one is genuinely interested in the truth then one should first establish what is it and then adjust oneself to it instead of forever looking for something that will fit ones particular conviction or experience or opinion. I know it is a harsh thing to say to someone struggling with what you are up against but I don't know if it would help by leaving it out. Muslims believe that a Human being has the potential to move galaxies let alone a "little" matter of self control. Of course it is not little. But even some philosophers have touched on the matter of the potential a human holds within him or her. It is almost limitless. The idea is to raise yourself to a level where your desires and behavior should follow your decisions and not the other way around. Granted easier said than done but at the same time what we need to do is to resolve more fundamental issues of existence first and the rest should follow.
On top of the daily struggles of individuals, it is sad to see that some activists of the movement are busy spreading false and misleading information. The main objective behind "born gay" slogan is a blatant attempt to force people to believe that nothing can be done. It helps the movement but individuals suffer. On the contrary if one were to look up several scientific studies on identical twins it would greatly expose this myth.
On a personal note if one is cornered into believing that their position is hopeless than that is exactly how one starts to feel and it becomes that much more difficult to see alternatives. We all have our demons to fight and if one has to worry about the society around them as you find yourself in then the fight is a lonely one but by no means a hopeless one. Did you know that a human can completely rewire their brains in as little as four weeks?|
I would for now give it some time either way. What you shouldn't do is to go public because that would unnecessary add to your wows and not resolve anything. I know you said prayers doesn't work but still do pray, God has His own ways of helping us all :)
I don't know if my rambling helped but please feel free to contact me any time.
Thank you for your response and I apologise for putting you on the spot, I'm aware that it's a sensitive issue and is, unfortunately, difficult to understand for those who don't feel this way and even sometimes for those who do. I don't deny that the Qur'an is God's book and that we as humans cannot overrule a Qur'anic command. Obviously your opinion is that homosexuality is a matter of self-control and is something that can be blew away with some re-wiring (thinking). Many people before you, especially Homophobic Christians, have tried to perpetuate the idea that homosexuality can be "cured". Have you not seen the people who went through months or even years of therapy or meditation or even medication to "cure" their homosexuality or bisexuality but the only result was psychological damage? Scientific research has shown that "treating" gays only makes them feel worse at the end, because they're desires and feelings resume and this makes them feel hopeless. Speaking of hopelessness, let me clarify that the reason I feel hopeless isn't because society's told me being gay isn't a choice and can't be cured, I feel hopeless because the society I live in taught me otherwise: being gay is unnatural and can be cured, so I always had the idea that I can easily rewire my brain with meditation and prayer and purifying my intentions and I'll be straight. I tried, and tried, and tried, and the reason I feel hopeless is because I know from my own experience that training myself to be straight will only cause me grief and depression. Similarly, research has found that society, family upbringing, and childhood experiences most likely do not play a part in a person's sexuality. In other words, there's zero evidence for this claim of "you weren't born gay, you became gay because society gave you a choice to be gay if you want". I already knew this was bogus as the only choice I've been given by my family and society is to be straight or get the hell out, but of course research studies help. Scientific studies conducted in North America has resulted in the possible finding of "gay wiring" in the genes, or a "gay gene" to be precise. Since the early 2000s some parents who had examinations have been told that their unborn foetus will most likely be gay. Scientific research has also found that in most cases the gay kid is not the first born as the gene is more susceptible in the second birth and so on.
DeleteI have been studying the Qur'anic view of homosexuality and I can say that they are not necessarily spreading false and misleading information, for instance one Emirati writer has made quite a compelling case using the Qur'an but it is in Arabic, if you would like I can send you a couple of links. I won't go into detail about the vague references to homosexuality in the Qur'an and why the story of Lot does not condemn homosexuality but I'll save that for if your interested. Let me remind you that we are essentially on the same side, to seek the truth (even if it is against my own desires) through the Quran and the Quran alone hence it is the word of God and God tells us to follow nothing religiously but His word. :)
Salam, didn't mean to challenge your understanding of the issue and you are right on this particular issue I am at a disadvantage to fully walk in your shoes. My perceptive is however based on the teachings of the Quran and I am aware of the various interpretations of the story of Lot. But please do send me what you have. In the meantime please Google "studies on twins and homosexuality" to give yourself a different perspective.
DeleteI in no way meant to belittle your reality. It is just that my personal experiences have taught me that almost nothing is impossible :)
Sorry forgot to reply to your part about identical twins. Well studies throughout the 90s showed an at least 65% concordance rate in twins and sexuality, especially if the twins are the same sex. Compare that to a concordance rate in other siblings and it proves that biology must have at least SOME say in a person's sexuality :)
DeleteFrom one anonymous to another,
ReplyDeleteI'm not a religious expert by any means but you seem to me to be pretty depressed and as someone who has been there before (I am struggling with my own issues), I would like to offer you my perspective on the issue that you're struggling with.
From my personal experience, I think you're depressed because there are two major forces battling themselves out in your life. One, you believe the Quran to be the absolute truth (which is why you're not interested in the LGBT muslim community because what you seek is absolute truth not camaraderie in being part of an unpopular minority) but two, you're innate desire is something not allowed in the Quran. This is a really difficult situation to be in and I don't think anyone is going to be able to give you an answer that fully makes everything okay.
Despite how difficult and thorny this situation is, the choices you have to make are simple (but hard regardless of your choice). You can reject the Quran as the ultimate source of truth and give in to your desires (then there will be no inner conflict of opposing forces pitting themselves against each other within you). You can look for a loophole in the Quran that allows what you want (but deep down you may know that this is not present and that this would be manipulation of the words in the Quran to suit your purposes, which is why you're posting here). Or you can accept that the Quran IS the truth and therefore, Allah (the creator of the universe) knows best and trust Allah to guide you through what will probably be a lifetime journey of struggle.
Now bear with me while I quote a hadith (not as a religious source but as a helpful quote) that goes something like, we have returned from the small Gihad to the big Gihad (the small Gihad being the war and the big Gihad being the struggle to purify and perfect yourself). The struggle to improve yourself, to better yourself, is truly a Gihad, a struggle that consumes oneself, a lifetime of work (so no one is undervaluing how much effort this is going to take). Depression, misery, self-loathing and all those terrible feelings that we can feel often arise because there’s a big gap between who we want to be and who we are. The greater the gap between who we are and who we wish we were, between our actual behavior and our belief in how we OUGHT to act, the greater the pit of misery and depression, which can quickly become a vicious, out of control cycle.
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DeleteI usually refrain from commenting on these kinds of posts, but I could feel your depression emanating through your post and I know that there is not a lot of literature or support out there in the muslim community for stuff like this.
I’m struggling with my own issues and have given it a lot of thought over many years and here’s the perspective it has given me (and I’m not saying this to force my opinion on you, I’m just telling you what has worked for me in case it helps you). My personal experience has made me believe that just because you WANT something (and you’re truly innately attracted to it) does not mean that it is right or that it is good for you. You may want (really bad!) to drink alcohol, you may want to have a modern life without any of the conventional constrictions of marriage, you may want a lot of things but that does not make it good for you or society, which is why Allah has outlawed it. So I’m not saying that you’re feelings aren’t real but that by accepting the Quran, you accept God’s wisdom in outlawing these things. Personally, the truth in Allah’s wisdom has been confirmed for me over my life. When I follow God’s orders, I feel inner peace, the misery and despair are gone and are replaced with a feeling of contentment, which is the best feeling I have ever had. Things go well in my life and I’m more productive in my work. It’s a feeling that life is good, things in the world are good, your relationship with Allah is good and Allah supports you and hears your prayers and strengthens your resolve, and that you are finally at peace with who you are. When I waiver and fall, I re-enter the pit of misery and feel so acutely terrible and everything in my life goes bad simultaneously. You may relapse (and probably will numerous times) but that does not mean you should give up, just work through it and lift yourself up again. Do you think that Allah will not see how much of an effort you are making and reward you for it accordingly? And he is the most forgiving, the all-Merciful, so never doubt Allah’s ability to forgive you even when you don’t want to forgive yourself.
What I have personally found that helps me to be strong is to start by eliminating every possible stimulus that can lead to a relapse. The more extensive the elimination, the more effective it is and the stronger your resolve will be. This will take a lot of reflection about yourself and what are the triggers in your life (maybe it’s TV, maybe it’s certain songs etc). You can’t control the way you feel but you can control your response to it, you can control your exposure to certain things that will make you feel that way, and you can control your thoughts (the last is hard to do and may take a long time before you become skilled at it). And the more you control your thoughts, the more you find that it’s not on your mind all the time anymore and you find peace from it. Again, I want to say that this process will probably by interrupted by relapses but don’t give up.
Personally, I have no problem with the LGBT community. I’m not writing this post as some kind of discriminatory rant, but only because I feel that you are looking for a certain perspective on the issue and I’m hoping that this may help you a bit.
Last, pray to Allah all the time. Ask Allah to give you strength to help you. Constantly make duaa even if you don’t feel like it, even if you feel like there’s no connection between you and God and that you’re so far away from God. The connection takes time to build, so don’t give up if you don’t have that feeling of inner peace right away. I will pray for you to reach peace.
Hope this post hasn't offended you in any way and if it has, I'm really sorry because that wasn't my intention.
I'm three months late but I've only just seen this.
ReplyDeleteI'll address a few points you made that caught my eye. Firstly i'm not looking for a "loophole" or trying to twist words, i'm doing the opposite. All the evidences I've seen "against" homosexuality are twisting of words. Secondly, your likening sexuality to, say, an inclination to drink alcohol is inaccurate. You can't liken a natural disposition that has been observed in more than 1,500 species to a material inclination to do something harmful. You're absolutely right about God's wisdom in things, but God says the word and reason of the Quran is clear and God doesn't outlaw something without reason and since there's no clear reason as well as no clear Quranic piece of evidence that outlaws homosexuality, to me it's still an open discussion. Thirdly you said "eliminate everything that may lead to a relapse". If you study psychology or at least sexual diversity in psychology then you'll know you can't "eliminate" things that lead to feeling sexual tendencies. Trying to do such things only causes psychological harm as countless researches have proven. Denying your sexuality or trying to bury it and "distract" yourself from it only has negative effects, so why would God mandate something that has negative effects on us?
Yes you're right, I am depressed about my situation and it probably shows. But you're wrong about me trying to find a loophole just to satisfy my inner desires. Sexuality isn't a "desire" it's an embedded disposition. I don't have an inner conflict between coming to terms with myself and accepting the Quran as the ultimate source of truth, I have a conflict between coming to terms with myself and how people interpret the Quran. Once again, likening sexuality to material needs/wants like wanting to smoke or wanting to rob a bank is very different from a biological embedding that, should it be buried or condemned innerly, can have serious consequences on the denier's mental health. I invite you to read the links I posted (particularly homosexualityishalal.com if you don't speak Arabic) and no I wasn't offended. :)